• Years ago I remember hearing one of my favorite spiritual teachers, Dr Wayne Dyer, being asked how he felt about dying (he was and might still be diagnosed with leukemia) and leaving the children he was just speaking so lovingly about. While I heard him speak almost detached, what I realized, and your story reminded me of this, at some point he was able to know, it was OK to let go. Thanks for your beautiful reminder Susan.

    • Aw, thank you Patricia. Life is what it is. Holding on to things that can’t help us, in fact could harm us is not good. I’m trying to identify those and to make good decisions for my new life. 🙂

  • Cheryl Therrien

    Yeah, I get this. Each time we have moved house we have had to get ruthless about getting rid of items that were not needed. I realize it’s not exactly the same thing, but in some ways it is. Get rid of those things that hold you back and hold on to those that take you forward. I am so happy for you and your husband. You have waited a long time for this day. Don’t forget to celebrate!

    • Hi Cheryl, Yep, you do get it my friend. we are very excited about this new phase in our lives and we hope that we are making the right decisions as to what to keep and what not to hold on to. In any case we are looking forward to what the future may bring.

  • I could totally relate to this Susan. Moving to a new phase of our life can be exciting, but it’s very difficult to let go of the old you. At least you can feel good about what you are doing now, and know that whatever you turn your hand to next you’ll have the drive to succeed. But it’s important to take the time to grief. And then let go.

    • Thanks A.K. I thought I had until I had to make these decisions. It just goes to show that moving on and grieving are in stages. They happen when we’re ready don’t they.

  • Greg Narayan

    It’s really hard knowing what to fight for and what to leave, and even though people will tell us there’s no saying they’re right. Hey, dropped you a mention in the latest Blogging and Life, Susan!

    • Hi Greg. Indeed that is true. Picking what we choose to hold on to what to let go of isn’t all that easy. Thanks so much for the mention, I’ll be checking it out. 🙂

  • Sometimes “things” carry a lot of meaning and emotions! I remember the task of cleaning out my parents’ home after my mother had died, and my father realized it was time to move. In the end, a friend who appreciated my father hired a packing company as a gift. It was so hard.

    • I so understand. We had to sell and sort all our parent things after they passed away. It was one of the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. This ranked right up there. 🙂

  • Hi Susan: Exciting to learn that your hubby is coming to share your beautiful home! When I left corporate life, I couldn’t wait to get rid of my business suits! I have one now that I use on rare occasion, but it’s part of my new life. Not my old. I am not very sentimental, so it’s not that hard for me to move on and leave unnecessary things behind. But what I would have done in the case of the robe, is have someone make me a pillow/cushion from the robe. That way, a piece of it (and the memories of my friend) would be with me and out in full view rather than being stuffed away in a closet. Cheers!

    • Hi Doreen, That is a great idea. The good news is I do have other things that she had given that will never leave me. So the robe was more a symbol of what I had to do. It still was very hard to do. 🙂

  • Jon Jefferson

    This reminds me that I probably need to clean out my closet. We make it a point to get rid of excess as often as possible.

    Isn’t it funny though, no matter how much you get rid of, there is always more?

    • That is so true. I always wonder, where does this stuff comes form? But I know it’s from me… LOL

  • Klaudia

    It’s time to let go …and it’s not easy…but maybe just maybe that first small step can help.
    Great podcast, thank you

    • Thanks Klaudia and welcome, When we make that first step, the others do come easier. 🙂

  • maxwell ivey

    hi susan; what a great video. Its not surprising that the hard one to let go of was something with personal attachment far beyond its apparent value. I don’t have much from my past lives. I sometimes wonder if maybe I don’t let go of things too easily. i gave away most all my clothes after losing all that weight. and i don’t even think i would miss my laptop as long as th next model still has speech and i can still get my work done on it. thanks for sharing. It couldn’t have been easy. take care, max

    • Thanks Max. It was easy letting go of that robe, that’s for sure. It was an interesting lesson that my past friend was able to indirectly teach me. I still miss her, I guess I always will 🙂

  • Jeri Walker-Bickett

    I’m not too sentimental when it comes to the realm of physical things, but I get how memories and emotions can get attached to significant items. Mental baggage on the other hand, I have tons of that!

    • Physical or mental, I never thought I was like that until I had to make these decisions. It was a huge wake up call, Jeri, and one I hope to have learned something from. 🙂

  • Lorraine Marie Reguly

    Oh, Susan. I feel for you.

    My son went through the same thing when his favourite hoodie became too tattered to wear. He used to live in that thing! He cried but eventually threw it out. We had a long talk that night. He was mature enough to make the decision himself, too. I had nothing to do with it, and was proud of him.

    I’m proud of you, too. 😉

    • Thank you Lorraine. What a nice story about your son. Regardless of what it is or whatever our age, letting go to move on is never easy, but it’s something we must do to move on in our lives.

  • Jason Butler

    It seems like every other year I have to let go of something to get to the next level. Sometimes it’s hard, but it’s usually for the best.

    • I know exactly what you mean Jason. Letting go may be hard, but the rewards for doing so are so very great. 🙂

  • Meredith Wouters

    I can really understand sitting on the floor of your closet, crying over a blue robe you never really wore. Change is never easy, as even the best kinds of change involve letting go of some kind. I wish you blessings in your move, enough to overflow your heart and, while they’ll never take your friend’s place, they’ll just expand your heart to make room for more.

    • Aw, thank your Meredith. I so appreciate your kind words (Sniff… Hugs). I know with all the support from great people like yourself I’ll find a way to pull it all together. 🙂

  • Jacs Henderson

    Very happy Susan to hear your new life is shaping up!
    That was such a moving story, and I just know that I have to get my life and stuff from the past sorted. I have things still in my parents attic! But I’m sure emotional attachment is a big part of the letting go – and I think when I feel more stable in my current situation, I may find the courage to do that.
    What a challenge for you to be combining houses, but as usual, that encouraged a beautiful story, both happy and sad – and you can move on with your friend’s blessing.
    Much love and luck with the move 🙂
    Jacs

    • Your comment touched me Jacs. I know how all these “things” can have a pull and draw at the same time. Letting go is such a simple phrase that isn’t so easy to activate. I know you’ll find a way to sort it all out as I will with the rest of the stuff I need to do. Hugs. 🙂

  • Yeah there are things in my life I have had trouble letting go of more so as I get older when I was first married Tim talked me into tossing out some things and I have regretted it ever since.

    • I think that so the case with me too Jo-Anne. The memories attached to our things are much more important then the items we hold on too. Yet, we still need to make some hard decisions. Sigh!

  • Susan — there are times I feel you and I are kindred spirits. I, too, am discarding clothes, books and, soon, furniture as I prepare to sell my apartment and downsize. I brought 8 bags of old business clothes, things I’d never fit into and stuff I hadn’t worn in years to the thrift shop. Just this evening I was going through the file cabinets in my office and discarding files I hadn’t used in 20 years. It’s liberating actually. I had a cashmere coat that I loved and never wore in recent years. Friends said I should sell it on eBay. Instead I decided to take it along with two other coats to the coat drive for the poor at the nearby police precinct. A young policeman greeted me at the door and said, “How wonderful you are donating your coats. It is so cold and many people don’t have any. God bless.” I left feeling uplifted.

    • I believe you may be right. I agree, it’s SO liberating once you get past all the emotional stuff that prevents it from happening. I can just imagine how that must have felt when you heard the gratitude in the policeman’s voice. I know it would have warmed my heart as I know it did yours. Hugs and good luck with YOUR move and change. 🙂

  • Merle Gibbins

    Love the story Susan. I can relate to a lot of it. I keep hanging on to my smaller size clothes thinking I am going to fit into them again but alas it didn’t happen so had to move them on to someone who would be able to wear them. Also on the business side I have let go of a lot of opportunities that were not doing anything for me. Thanks for sharing.

    • Hi Merle, I think we all do that, all in the hope we will grow into the size we once were. I agree the same challenges applies in our business lives as well. Nevertheless it’s still hard to let go. 🙂

  • Finding the courage to let go. Well said. Thank you for sharing your heart!

    • Thanks Jen, I very much appreciate you stopping by and lending your thoughts to the discussion. 🙂

  • Debra Yearwood

    Wow, both difficult and amazing. Thanks so much for sharing Susan, a great life lesson for all of us.

    • Thanks Debra, It wasn’t easy for sure but it was time. My friend would have laugh at my indecision and push me, as we did in a different way, to move on with my life. 🙂

  • I read once, that it is only ours to borrow while we are here. That was a revelation, but still I know what you mean. I have been slowly getting rid of stuff but some finds it way back into the closet or drawer. Perhaps another time or it may just have to travel with me when I can finally move, then maybe a decision will be made.

    • Hi Mary, I have done that so often, taken something out to give away and then only to change my mind. I think your right, there is a time and place when it feels right to finally let it go. 🙂

  • I haven’t kept very much of my past except for photos. I do have a flute that has sat in a closet since right before I turned eighteen. I can’t play it (disability). I’ve tried to sell it. The only problem is I want to make sure it goes to someone who will play iy. I don’t want it sitting in someone else’s closet. Just remembered something else I haven’t given up – my wedding dress.

    • Hi Glynis, I so get that. that flute must hold a very special place in your heart to have it for so long. I do hope it finds a good home, and sings it song again for someone else. 🙂

  • My eldest and my middle daughter left home at the same time much sooner than I anticipated. I kept hanging onto the hope that they would come back home. I eventually came to the realisation that I had to let go.

    • Hi Vivian and welcome, Aw, I hear you. As much as we wish it, there are times it’s just not meant to be. I’m glad you were able to move on. 🙂

  • Jay

    Susan, I agree with this and have written something similar when it comes to relationships. Holding on to the past definitely holds you back. Is the blue robe from the person you mentioned in a comment on my site. Once again sorry for your loss..

    • Hi Jay, Thanks and yes, the blue robe was hers. I still miss her. Life isn’t easy as it is. Holding on the stuff can be part of the challenge but once we are able to let go, it’s like a breath of fresh air. 🙂

  • Hi Susan,
    I know the difficulty of letting go. It took me years to let go of all the abuse I suffered while growing up, In the final analysis, letting go of it all comes down to a choice for each of us. If the past teaches us something great.
    Being open to changes makes it easier to let go.

    • Hi Bill, I think the hard part of our life’s experience is letting of stuff, be it physical or mental. I am os happy your were able to find a way past your old hurts. I know that wasn’t easy. 🙂

  • Krisma M.

    Hi Susan, I can almost feel your emotions while I was reading this. I guess, women share this kind of sentimentality which is why I can totally relate to it. 🙂

    • Hi Krisma and welcome, I agree with you, we women are a sentimental lot. It’s hard to let go of that sentiment in such a physical way, don’t you think?

  • Hey Susan,

    I have had similar situations (although not so strong as yours)…As a kid, I had a habit of assigning personality to my things – I talked to my clothes, my bed.

    It was weird, but also fun…so, I had a hard time letting them go. I always kept those things, even if they were broken and even if I never wore them again.

    It’s hard to let go…but I don’t have that problem anymore (I wonder why? I no longer have an emotional connection with the things I use…perhaps I lost my imagination and innocence I had as a child).

    These days, I don’t worry much about that…I have already given away most of the stuff..to charity. I know there are lot of unfortunate folks out there.

    Thank you for sharing this experience, Susan 🙂 Good to see that you are letting go!

    • Hi Jeevan, I think when we assign a personality to something it makes it doubly hard to let those things go. As far as where you are today? I think, good or bad, it’s called growing up… 🙂 I so appreciate you stopping by and lending your voice to the conversation. 🙂

  • Rebecca Thompson

    Oh wow Susan. I felt every tinge of sadness and was almost wanting you not to throw the blue robe.
    You are right though. We do need to let go of the past to enable us to move into the future.
    It is a lot harder than it sounds, but there should be some kind of release that comes with it too.
    I think I need to do a little more work in this area. There are way too many things that I still cling to. Some have been ripped away by this bloody sickness and they are the hardest to let go of.

    • Hi Rebecca, I know that as I continue to sort thru things to consolidate our two homes it will continue to be a challenge but I know in the end it will be worth it. I think we all are in need of work in this area, both in a physical and mental way. 🙂

  • Lesly Federici

    Hi Susan,
    I LOVED your video and your message. I am right now going through the same thing. Getting rid of things.. and I want to part with my wedding dress and can’t seem to do it … wonderful to visit you for the first time I think …

    • Well hi there Lesly and welcome, Thanks so much. There are some things that will stay with us for a very long time before we are ready to say good by. In regards to your wedding dress, you will know when that is. . 🙂

  • Hi Susan,
    I love the way you have done this post, with that video in it! Letting go has never been a problem for me. I can relate to your business suits. When I moved away from my office and took my business on the phone and on line, I had no use for my beautiful suits. I did hold on to them for a year but then realized why the heck am I taking so much room in my closet, when I don’t wear them anymore. I saved one little black suit just in case I wanted to wear it.
    It was such a good feeling when I took them over to a similar place that you did. They were so happy. Actually, I packed them with the appropriate shoes, blouses and handbags. 10 perfect outfits!

    -Donna

    • Hi Donna, I do find it funny how we have the tendency to hold on to things that we will never use again. I’m the worst, well actually my husband is… LOL.

      I love how you took such care in creating outfits. I know it must have brightened someone’s day when they were presented with them. 🙂

  • Susan – we’re in a similar situation right now because we’re staying in my wife’s Grandma’s house who passed away three years ago. Her uncle still owns the house and is having a very hard time getting rid of it. We’ve started going through the stuff, and I think he’s finally to the point where he’s ready. It’s definitely not easy!

    • I don’t think it’s ever easy, Dan. It may be physical stuff, but it’s associated with so many memories, it’s the thought of letting the memories go is where the trouble lies. Good luck with that my friend. 🙂

  • Pat Ruppel

    I love this, Susan, and can truly relate. Seems like I’ve been holding on to so many things in my life that I wouldn’t know where to start if I had to let go of them like you did. Funny how we can’t find the way to do it voluntarily but life finds a way to nudge us nevertheless. I’ve had that in places I can no longer go back to so I have no choice but let them go.

    • Hi Pat, We often forget that things evoke memories. That is why letting go of them is so hard. I’ve learned that the memories are lasting if we want them to be. It’s not things that keep them with us. It took me a while to figure that out. 🙂

      • Pat Ruppel

        So true, Susan. I can see that. It may take me longer to figure that out or a move to force me into action.

  • Dana Buckmir

    Susan, I found this post very interesting. Sometimes when you want to “clean out your closet” it becomes so overwhelming that you choose to avoid it altogether. Your story makes me think about my meditative yoga class last week. The instructor discussed the idea of letting go. She said, “Those things that we hold onto so tightly cause us pain. We have to practice letting go.” Her words were very powerful to me and they resonated in the story that you told.

    • Hi Dana, Overwhelming is the word I would use too…LOL. It wasn’t easy, but I got it done. That is so interesting about your yoga teacher and her thoughts about letting go. I couldn’t agree with her more. What have you struggled with letting go of?